You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
True college students do jello shots in the library
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
