I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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