i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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