I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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