So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
