Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
