This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
