Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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