Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize