All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
