DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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