lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
