i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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