I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I queefed so loud it echoed.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
