So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
