Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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