The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
