At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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