Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I smell stomach acid.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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