Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize