At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Randomize