I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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