I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
im holly from the hills drunk
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
