DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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