Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
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