she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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