Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I have aggressive nipples.
Randomize
