party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Randomize
