Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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