Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(973): View more from New Jersey

oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick

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(502): View more from Kentucky

people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails

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(310): View more from California

I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.

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(707): View more from California

Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!

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