She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
