Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
