I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
