I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
