It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
