The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
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