How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
