I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
How does it feel to date your dad?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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