Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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