You can't special order awesome
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize