Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
