Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
