covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
i've created a new STD.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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