I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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