they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
