Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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