I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
