And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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