Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
