goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize