Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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